Yesterday I received the following message from a lady I hold in high esteem:

My husband is a gift and a testimony and for this, he shall be blessed in his spirit and soul. His body shall be full of vitality of the Lord, his life garnished with wealth and abundance, he is experiencing peace all around. I shall not mourn over him, because he is satisfied with long life, he shall live and take care of our children and I. He will eat the good of this land. The Lord will not take him where there is no grace. The Lord will keep our love alive and our marriage will be more fruitful than ever before in Jesus Name.

Send this declaration to ten married women and watch God bless Bur husband richly and abundantly.

After reading the message, I realized it was a great prayer and as the last line request, I decided to send the same message, un-edited to some of my married female friends. Out of the ten I sent to, only three responded; one simply said "Amen", the second one re-sent it to me, the third one thanked me for sending it to her and told me how she loves reading my blogs (I truly felt humbled by this). The fourth and last one who responded threw me off balance because she was as blunt and as honest as she has always been. Her view of the institution of marriage has totally changed as is evident in this brief conversation we had....

She: Liz..these type of husbands are no more.. I have no married woman to send this to....can u imagine? Lol…. Mambo za mob days?

Me: I know! But miracles do happen you know...:-)

She: In this lifetime?

Me: Yes...:-) Unless you've lost faith in God too....

She: Those miracles happen after you have been hassled mpaka ushachoka...that’s when the seven demons in him, go for a vacation….

Me: Lol!!! You still have your wicked sense of humor I see….

She: This what I tell my friends nowadays…..treat your hubby the way you treat any stranger in need... you see, you don’t expect anything from a stranger...so you don’t feel bad when nothing comes your way in return for your good deeds….that way..,..you will be happy.

I’ve not lost faith in God….we stopped asking for changes. We now ask for strength to cope with what comes our way….

Fortunately for me and the clever ones, we stopped complaining as that only gives us pressure for no reason...we have accepted our situations…. tushakubali kuonekana wajinga, if it will bring serenity in our lives……

We didn't continue with the conversation since I guess we both got busy. However her words left me with lots of disturbing thoughts and questions regarding the institution of marriage. I'd like to bounce off some of those on you, hoping we can make sense of any of this.

1. In your view, why do you think relationships and especially marriages are having a hard time surviving nowadays?
2. Why would my friend say something as disturbing as "I have no married woman to send this to", not because all her friends are single, but because none of her married friends are happy in their marriages?
3. Is this to mean that happily married couples are non-existent nowadays? 
4. Why is it that troubled relationships/marriages/families, for one reason or another, have become the norm as opposed to the exception?

Please feel free to air your views and let's get this conversation going. Share this with others and let's hear their views as well. I'm still naive enough to believe that marriages can be renewed, relationships can be healed and above all, trust and faithfulness can be restored between couples.

Feel free to share your thoughts and/or views.